Cup of Coffee: August 28, 2025

Good morning! And welcome to Free Thursday!

First, a little programming note: there will be no newsletter tomorrow, as I have a personal engagement out of town today and tonight which will prevent me from writing. I may send out a "hi, I'm out of the office" thing so commenters can chat and whatnot, but I'm not writing anything substantive.

Yes, going to see Oasis in concert in the year 2025 is the most washed Gen-X excuse to call off of work imaginable, but we all need a little time to wake up – need a little time to wake up, wake up – need a little time to wake up, need a little time to rest our minds.

And it's not like I don't already build every late summer and fall around seeing bands that have been around since John Major was Prime Minister. I mean, just wait until next month when I post about the multiple James and Pulp shows I'm traveling to see.

And That Happened

Here are the scores. Here are the highlights:

Yankees 11, Nationals 2: Some days you're better off forfeiting. The Yankees had the forfeit score plus two – 11-0 – by the fourth. That came thanks to homers from Trent Grisham, Aaron Judge, Cody Bellinger, Ben Rice, Ryan McMahon, and Austin Wells. Nine of those runs came in the third inning when the Yankees sent fifteen batters to the plate and Nationals pitchers threw 77 pitches. Yet, somehow the funniest part was that inning was that Anthony Volpe made two of the three Yankees outs. Also fun: the Nationals lost their DH in the third because the one who started the game – Riley Adams – had to take over at catcher when starting catcher Drew Millas had to leave the game when he broke his finger on a catcher's interference play. When it rains it frickin' pours. The Yankees sweep and win their fourth straight.

Atlanta 12, Marlins 1: Atlanta hitters had five homers. Jurickson Profar had two of them. Ozzie Albies had one – a three-run shot – and knocked in five. Atlanta won 12-1 here and 11-2 on Tuesday. Too bad there wasn't one more game in this series because if they played again today I bet it'd be 13-0.

Guardians 4, Rays 3: Nolan Jones' solo homer in the bottom of the ninth tied things up and Kyle Manzardo walked it off by singling home the Manfred Man in the bottom of the tenth. The Guardians' pen gave 'em four shutout innings. Cleveland takes two of three.

Mariners 4, Padres 3: For the second game in a row Eugenio Suárez smacked a three-run homer. This one came in the fourth and gave Seattle a 4-0 lead which would prove sufficient. Luke Raley had an RBI double and Bryan Woo earned his 12th win of the season after allowing two runs while working into the sixth.

Red Sox 3, Orioles 2: Ceddanne Rafaela hit a two-run homer in the ninth to give Boston a comeback win. Roman Anthony homered in the first. The Sox will go for a four-game sweep later today.

Mets 6, Phillies 0: Someone on Bluesky yesterday – if it was one of you I apologize, but I forgot who it was – said that the NL East is hilarious because the Mets can never beat Atlanta, Atlanta can never beat Philly, and the Phillies can never beat the Mets. I know that there are notable exceptions in all of those cases, but there's a deep, visceral truth to it that transcends empirical reality.

Anyway, New York took care of business once again, sweeping the three-game set. Nolan McLean tossed eight shutout innings to win his third straight start to start his career and Brooks Raley closed out the five-hitter. They were backed by three RBI singles in the third, an RBI single by Mark Vientos in the fifth, and a two-run Vientos homer in the seventh.

Pirates 2, Cardinals 1: Young Bubba Chandler did not start but he took the bulk role between the fourth and seventh, allowing just one hit while picking up the win. There were four Pirates pitchers in all who combined to allow one run on four hits. Tommy Pham's two-run single in the sixth was all the scoring necessary.

Royals 12, White Sox 1: Sal Perez and Mike Yastrzemski each homered. Yastrzemski's was a three-run job. Perez added a two-run double. Bobby Witt Jr. and Vinnie Pasquantino each singled in two in the fifth. Ryan Bergert allowed one over six. The Royals take two of three.

Blue Jays 9, Twins 8: Toronto trailed 8-6 heading to the bottom of the eighth when pinch-hitter Ty France homered to cut the deficit to one. Then pinch-hitter Alejandro Kirk –  Kirk! Not Peña! – singled and George Springer drew a walk before Addison Barger doubled off the wall in right to put the Jays ahead. Otherwise, Davis Schneider homered twice and Andrés Giméne went deep as well. Toronto takes two of three.

Diamondbacks 3, Brewers 2: Ryne Nelson gave up one run on six hits over six, Blaze Alexander hit a two-run homer in the sixth to give Arizona the lead and Geraldo Perdomo added an insurance run on a dinger in the eighth. Andrew Saalfrank got a five-out save.

Rangers 20, Angels 3: Adolis García, Joc Pederson, and Kyle Higashioka each had a three-run homer and each drove in five runs as the Rangers absolutely destroyed the Halos. Corey Seager had a two-run shot and Wyatt Langford, who didn't even play the whole game, reached base five times. Eight of Texas' runs came off of first baseman Oswald Peraza, who recorded just one out. The other three homers came off of Jack Kochanowicz, who is theoretically a pitcher. He allowed allowed 11 runs – 10 earned – in three and a third. This is the first time Texas has scored 20 runs since they beat the Twins 20-6 in 2011.

Astros 4, Rockies 0: Framber Valdez [all together now] turned in seven strong innings, shutting out Colorado on three hits. The pen handled the final two frames of the four-hit shutout. Yordan Alvarez, recently returned from months on the IL with a broken hand, homered for the first time since April 27. Cam Smith also went deep for Houston, which remains a game and a half up on Seattle in the AL West.

Dodgers 5, Reds 1: Shohei Ohtani, going five innings for the first time since his pitching comeback, picks up his first pitching win since August 9, 2023. He allowed one run and struck out nine. Dodgers pitchers combined to strike out 19 Reds batters in all, which, woof. The runs came on a pair of two-run singles in the fourth, one from Kiké Hernández and one from Dalton Rushing. Michael Conforto added a solo homer in the eighth. L.A. sweeps the Reds – it's the first time anyone has swept the Reds all season, in fact – and wins their fourth straight as they extend their NL West lead to two games over San Diego.

Giants 12, Cubs 3:  Rafael Devers homered twice and doubled in a run while driving in five. Matt Chapman hit his 200th career home run and Heliot Ramos also homered – his came on a 38 mph eephus pitch from catcher Reese McGuire – as the Giants strolled to victory.

Athletics 7, Tigers 0: A's rookie pitcher Luis Morales, who is just 22, was making his fourth career start and his fifth career appearance and all he did was shut out the Tigers on two hits over seven innings. His ERA is 1.19. It'll get higher but he's gotta be enjoying things right now. Zack Gelof homered, doubled and drove in four runs and Brett Harris and Nick "The Colonel" Kurtz each had two hits and scored twice. Sacramento sweeps the Detroit.

The Daily Briefing

Brewers closer Trevor Megill has a flexor strain

Brewers closer Trevor Megill has been diagnosed with a Grade 1 flexor strain in his right elbow. The club placed him on the injured list yesterday. Megill says that it’s a "mild" strain and he’s hoping for a minimum stint on the injured list, but it's obviously worth watching given that he's been a key part of the Brewers' rise to the top of Major League Baseball this summer.

Megill, 31, has 30 saves in 49 appearances this season. He has a 2.54 ERA (164 ERA+) and has struck out 58 batters in 46 innings.

Oh this is fun

The Megill injury was, quite honestly, the only significant baseball news of the day yesterday. Like, I could've manufactured a couple of news items about more minor injuries to a couple of players but, eh, that's not really what I do around here. If you want someone to be a completist with that stuff go to Rotoworld or MLB Trade Rumors or something.

But I will take this time to note that Grimsby Town, which competes in the fourth level of English football, defeated rich and once-mighty Manchester United yesterday in EFL Cup action. It, instantly, became one of the biggest upsets in English football in living memory.

United clawed their way back from a 2-0 hole in the game's final 15 minutes to manage a 2-2 draw. But since this is a knockout tournament it went to penalty kicks where Grimsby prevailed 12-11. The decisive, game-ending kick was this miss from Manchester's Bryan Mbeumo:

Mbeumo just joined Manchester United, having previously played for Brentford, whom he led in goals last season. He went to Manchester because he wanted to join the big boys and make the kind of money stars from on the big boy teams make. That's quite understandable, of course. It's just how things work in European football. So I, as a Brentford fan, have no hard feelings at all and sincerely wish the quite likable Mbeumo the best.

But seriously, dude: if you call Brentford I bet they'd take you back. At least if you ask nicely. They may not win as many games this year as they did last year but they ain't gettin' beat by Grimsby Town.

If you want to read a nice story from the perspective of a Grimsby Town supporter, check out this story by Laura Williamson at The Athletic.

Other Stuff

Update on "sucking eggs"

Yesterday in the recaps I described the work of an ineffective relief pitcher by saying he "sucked eggs." In my 52 years on Planet Earth I had always just assumed that was a more colorful way of saying someone performed poorly, but I was wrong! Subscriber Paper Lions hipped us to the true meaning of "sucking eggs" in the comments:

I love idioms. This made me wonder where "sucking eggs" came from. Turns out, it doesn't mean to be bad at something, but rather to give "unsolicited, unnecessary advice to someone who already possesses great expertise in that area" and is a shortened version of "don't teach your grandma to suck eggs" as grandmas were often toothless back then (1700s) and therefore experts at eating eggs with out teeth (called sucking eggs). I am guessing grandfathers were either dead or didn't have to worry about it as mansplaining was likely already a thing.

I am 100% going to say to someone, in the next six months, "don't teach your grandma to suck eggs." It may create some momentary awkwardness but it will give me a chance to share this bit of linguistic loveliness with someone whom I am sure will understand.

Grand Jury refuses to indict the sub sandwich-thrower

There's a well-known saying in the law about how prosecutors have such an easy time getting indictments from grand juries that "you can indict a ham sandwich." That may be true, but grand juries will apparently not indict a guy who throws one:

Federal prosecutors on Tuesday were unable to secure a felony assault indictment against a man who threw a sandwich at a federal agent on the streets of Washington this month, according to two people familiar with the matter. The remarkable failure by the U.S. attorney’s office in Washington was the second time in recent days that it was unable to persuade grand jurors to bring an indictment in a felony assault case against a federal agent. 

I saw some people on social media calling this "grand jury nullification." While I would not be at all surprised if we see a massive uptick in grand jury nullification in the wake of Trump's illegal deployment of troops and federal agents in our nation's cities, I do not think this case qualifies as nullification. I say that because they charged the guy with a felony count for an act that would never, ever, ever be charged as a felony in any other context. Grand juries may be overwhelmingly predisposed to issue indictments, but they're not complete rubber stamps, and it does not take an act of nullification for one to acknowledge that such charges in this case were completely unsupported.

In related news:

A federal judge dismissed a weapons case against a man held in the D.C. jail for a week — concluding he was subject to an unlawful search."It is without a doubt the most illegal search I've ever seen in my life," U.S. Magistrate Judge Zia Faruqui said from the bench. "I'm absolutely flabbergasted at what has happened. A high school student would know this was an illegal search."

The judge said Torez Riley appeared to have been singled out because he is a Black man who carried a backpack that looked heavy.

The illegal search and charges against this man is the direct result of newly-confirmed U.S. Attorney for the District of Columbia Jeanine Pirro directing prosecutors to seek maximum charges against defendants. Pirro, of course, is a Trump sycophant who hadn't actively practiced law for over 20 years before Trump tabbed her for this role. She has spent almost all of her time since 2005 as a cable news talking head for Fox and other conservative outlets, serving as a reality TV show host, and in being a witness in civil cases brought by people who were wrongfully convicted during her time as a county prosecutor, one of whom obtained a $41 million judgment against Westchester County, New York because Pirro refused to reopen his case despite compelling evidence of his innocence. Which is to say that she has no idea what she's doing if she's not spewing horseshit on television. All she cares about is putting non-white people behind bars in an effort to please the president.

We've seen that the judiciary, at least at its highest levels, will let the Trump Regime do basically whatever it wants, irrespective of the Constitution or the law. But the lower courts are not entertaining this fascist bullshit. At least not yet. Good for them.

Thank you for your service

National Guard soldiers called into service for President Trump's military occupation of Washington D.C. have been assigned to spread mulch and pick up trash at federal monuments and in the parks and public spaces around the White House:

Normally the Park Service does that, but the Trump Regime illegally impounded the money that goes towards that and fired the workers who do this sort of work.

If you live in Ohio, West Virginia, South Carolina, Louisiana, Mississippi, or Tennessee, or any other state which sent Trump National Guard troops for this unlawful military occupation be sure to thank your governor for deploying our friends, neighbors, family members, and co-workers for trash detail.

Quote of the Day: Western Architecture Edition

From John Paul Brammer, writing about an insane plan to build the Western Hemisphere's tallest building in his hometown of Oklahoma City:

"I simply think that buildings should reflect the character of a place, like how Santa Fe is all adobe and how Dallas looks designed by a sentient Ford-F150."

The piece is a long, pleasantly meandering, but always entertaining tale about Brammer's return to Oklahoma to do a story about this very tall pie-in-the-sky project. A project which, while approved by OKC's city council, seems like it's never going to be built and almost certainly should not be.

Along the way Brammer investigates a super shady-sounding and likely AI-created non-profit which managed to get tax increment-financing for low-income housing in the proposed tower which sounds super scammy. There is also some talk about kenophobia and observations about how hotel air-conditioners create a special kind of cold. He wrote much of this from an allegedly haunted hotel in downtown OKC in which retired NBA player Metta Sandiford-Artest – f/k/a Metta World Peace f/k/a Ron Artest – once claimed to have been sexually assaulted by a ghost. Like I said: there's a lot going on.

But that quote totally nails the architecture of Dallas, man. It's always unsettled me in a certain way when I've visited there, but Brammer is dead on in his description of it.

What your beverage order says about you

This article from Food & Wine – "What Your Go-To Drink Order Says About You, According to Servers" – is about as froofy as it comes, but it does contain at least a couple of Significant Truths.

Tap water being “fine” says you’re a real salt of the earth kind of person who takes things as they are even though you probably have a Brita filter at home. 

OK, that's just mean. It's 100% accurate about Allison and me whenever water choices are offered, but it's still mean. And ours is a Brita pitcher. Much easier to use to fill the cat bowl with that way. Don't judge me.

If you order coffee black, you give the impression you’re straightforward, decisive, and ready to get down to business. You don't have time for things like cream and sugar! You’re happy to drink your cup of joe with an omelet or a cheeseburger, but that java better be served at a temperature just below that of lava. And you’re definitely having a second cup.

I certainly order black coffee at restaurants – often that's my choice as dessert; not with dessert but as dessert – but (a) I'm not particularly decisive about most things; (b) rather than get down to business I fart around and procrastinate worse than most people you know; and (c) I am fine if my coffee is not lava-hot. Indeed, I usually prefer hot beverages to cool down a bit first because I always – always – burn my tongue. But yes, I am having a second cup.

There's also something about ordering hot tea at a restaurant and how it requires the server to retrieve a cup, saucer, hot water, lemon, and a box of tea choices for presentation, all for the cheapest possible item on the menu. That hasn't prevented me from ordering tea at restaurants in the past, but I have always felt weird about how fussy it all is. Glad someone else is acknowledging it.

A lawsuit over 40 years in the making

The Police song "Every Breath You Take" came out in 1983. Now, 42 years later, two of the members of the Police, Andy Summers and Stewart Copeland, are suing Sting and his publishing company over songwriting credit and royalties.

The basis for the suit is pretty straightforward: Summers, and to a lesser extent Copeland, have given interviews for years about how what would become the best-selling single of 1983 and the biggest hit of The Police's career was almost dead on the vine during the recording of "Synchronicity," the album on which it appears. Sting had written the lyrics, the melody and the chord progressions but, as you can hear on the demo that was released on an expanded edition of "Synchronicity" last year, the song was a rather limp and uninspired synth-driven thing. At best it sounds like a much-lesser Beatles album track from the "Beatles for Sale" era or, perhaps more aptly, some of Sting's later-career boring-ass adult contemporary movie soundtrack schlock. Decent enough because Sting is nothing if not a pro with a good ear for melody, but essentially filler and with the potential to slide into something almost treacly if someone made a misstep or two with it in the studio.

Sting, no doubt realizing this, was ready to chuck the song before asking Summers to do something with it to "make it [his] own." At that point Summers went into a back room and came out with the song's signature component: the looping guitar arpeggio that serves as the BIG hook of the thing and which everyone can immediately identify in like two seconds.

Also added during recording was Copeland's insistent snare sound which kicks off the song and continues throughout. This was Copeland's creation, as Sting's demo had a generic and tentative hi-hat thing going on that pretty clearly sounds like a placeholder. In what I consider to be a nod to the importance of Copeland's contribution to the song, the snare drum is a key visual to "Every Breath You Take" music video, with the opening image of the ashtray dissolving into an overhead shot of the drum being struck. As an MTV watcher in 1983 that shot and that beat was almost as important to the song as Summers' riff.

"Every Breath You Take" may have been a hit without Summers and Copeland's additions, but I don't think it'd be anything approaching what it was without them. I don't mean to discount the catchy melody, the deceptively sinister lyrics, and the song's absolutely astonishing bridge, all of which were Sting's creations. But what I think made it a monster hit was the driving nature of the thing. The brilliant creation of tension and its resolution, almost all of which is attributable to the guitar and drums. Indeed, I bet the first thing any of you think of when you think of "Every Breath You Take" is that opening snare shot and the guitar lick.

The story about the lawsuit is all over the Internet right now, having begun in the British tabloids, but I still cannot find an explanation as for why (a) this suit wouldn't be barred by the statute of limitations; and (b) Summers and Copeland did not get songwriting credit way back in 1983 to begin with.

The former point is one I'm unqualified to speak to as this case is taking place in the UK and I know jack crap about UK law. As for the second point: given that Summers and Copeland each had sole credit on one song apiece on "Synchronicity," with the rest credited to Sting alone, it's possible that there was just some unspoken understanding that there would be no group credits at the time. Or, given the notoriously acrimonious nature of those sessions, perhaps everyone just agreed to disagree forever. No idea.

The lawsuit, should it progress rather than be settled, will no doubt get into all of that. But given that, per The Sun, Sting still continues to earn £550,000 a year from that song alone over four damn decades later, it will likely be a hard fought case in the meantime.

I almost put "King of Pain" here because I like it better, but at some point you gotta stop overthinking things.

As I said above, no newsletter tomorrow, so have a great long weekend, everyone.