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The first game of the season, where to find the games, base coaches are pissed, old umpires are not pleased, some more bad business from the Tigers front office, and watching the fall of the American Empire

A Gerrit Cole update, a Berríos injury, in-park, delay-free radio broadcasts, Cesar Chavez's disgrace, Afroman prevails, robbing Val Kilmer's grave, and The King Teen's "True Stories of Time Travel"